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Chap 2.7 - Page 6frangles: Skip book 1: Writer's Bricks

             Welcome to an idea for Starbooks if you're entering, and goodbye if you're leaving.  If you're the former, please note that the time is now 2:76 and we will be closing shortly for the rest of the nova, so please impulsively grab an item or two before you leave.  If you're about to leave, please note that the time is only 2:76 and you still have just enough time to re-think your decision not to purchase the items you pulled off the shelf and left for us to put back.  If you're here accompanying anyone who enjoyed the books they read while here, remember, a surprise sentimental item for nostalgic and ethically redeeming purchases is always a great gift idea!
             All customers, please think up your final purchases to the vifa registers and a reasonable price to buy them at, add 30% to compensate for subjectivity and wishful thinking, then subtract up to 1.7% if you're a member for your optimistic spirit that you'll save more this year than you paid for discount membership.  Our cafe will remain open until closing, so come get some legal stimulants to keep you awake when you go.  A vague idea for one of our cathartic septuple suicide espressos is always a tasty treat at the end of the day.  Just remember to think up an antidote before it fully kicks in, because we'd be sad to loose you over a tragic Romeo and Juliet conclusion to your stay.  Not that any good would come out of it since you probably didn't buy any Shakespeare.
             We hope you think you enjoyed your frwoa, and look forward to seeing you again soon.  For your convenience, we're open 49/7, :11 to :77, so come back any time you figure out what the hell that means exactly, because we're not really sure yet.  Someone just noticed it on an outside window, and unfortunately the vifa nerds in our Mathematics section couldn't concentrate concretely enough to corporealize any relevant math axioms into meaningful real world applications.  We're looking forward to fleshing you and ourselves out more in time to come, so please return soon and help us out.  By the way, if you're anyone overly self-important--such as a Flulitzer-bound frwoa novelist named "Skip" or the greatest aspiring prodigy physicist since Einstein--remember to return as soon as you've found enough hallucinogens to turn your lofty dreams of fame into a reality and are hence are in the position to compensate us for the next set of customers your rowdy narcissism pisses off and scares away.
             Thank you for sort of shopping Starbooks and flipping sporadically through our books.  Return soon to read more than a few pages so you know what the hell anything you read randomly was actually all about.  Remember, the missing pages are worth the wait!

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